A Pirate Wedding
by Serenity LeVasseur
Summary: A sequel to A Pirate's Pride. Post-Game. Isabela and Varric have returned home from their adventures with Alistair (comic books). Hawke is ready to finally settle down and start a family. And Merrill is interested in... men? Plot and sexy times.
1. A Proposal

This is a sequel to A Pirate's Pride. It is set post-game, right where that story ended. I just thought Varric and Merrill deserved a love story. Surface dwarves need loving too.

I don't own Bioware or Dragon Age. I wish I did. I just borrow some characters to do my bidding. MUAHAHAHAHA!

* * *

Red Hawke looked out of the kitchen window. _Another day in paradise. _The wind blew through the palm trees. The waves slid across the shore. The seagulls cried as they danced in the air. _It's the exact opposite of Kirkwall. No alienage, no whores on every corner, no smelly sewer stench, no rodents of unusual size, and no uppity nobles. _

After being Champion of Kirkwall and Nemesis of the Knight-Commander (whom she gifted with an untimely death), she and Isabela needed to get away from the chaos. Mages, templars, seekers, Qun'ari! It was all such a mess!

Step 1, she bought her Pirate Queen a ship. The Rivaini decided to name it 'The Red Death' in honor of her lover, despite much debate. Varric thought it sounded like a life-threatening rash. But there was no changing her mind; the negative connotations were probably why she picked it out in the first place.

Step 2, she grabbed her mabari and some of her friends (the ones that weren't dead, on a mission to free all the Circle mages, or had already returned to their homeland… in other words, Merrill, Varric, Fenris, Bodahn and Sandal), and they sailed to the east. They docked on a small tropical island just south of the Llomerryn mainland. It was a nice little trading post. No one truly governed it, and no one asked too many questions.

Step 3, she bought the island and its only tavern. Since it was only half the size of Kirkwall, and most of the people there were merely passing through, it was a quick and easy purchase. This allowed Red to make her own laws, like: 'known slavers will be hung on sight', 'prostitutes must have regular checkups', and 'those who spill racial slurs will be flogged'. Varric and Fenris became Sentinels and enforced the very few laws.

Step 4, she commissioned two large houses and made them into a proper estate. The elves and the shady dwarf shared a house; and, of course, Isabela and Hawke lived together. Bodahn and his son resided at the other side of the Hawke mansion, though they were never around. They owned a shop near the docks where they sold enchanted armor, runes, and all sorts of exotic treasures. The estate also had a smaller guest house. Merrill wanted a garden, as well, but the flowers and herbs simply did not like to grow in the sand; at least, not for very long.

Hawke was making breakfast for Isabela. They had been exclusively together for about two years, but they had been a romantic item for five years. Once upon a time, they picked noble pockets, slit throats, tackled Darkspawn, and defied death on a daily basis. Now they were domesticated housewomen (not housewives quite yet); although, their version of domestication involved smoking, drinking, dueling and gambling. That worked for them. _I'll admit, I miss our old adventures… Fighting for our lives, angering Aveline, taking odd jobs to keep myself fed… It was all very exciting. _

The soft padding of not-so-tiny feet came from behind. "The Pirate Queen yet lives! If the smell of bacon didn't wake you, I was going to send Maximus to drag you out of bed." Having heard his name, the mabari stuck his head in the room, just to be shooed.

"You're too good to me." The Rivaini wrapped her arms around her lover's waist and kissed the back of her neck. "I've missed real food." She reached toward the pan, only to get her hand smacked.

"It's not done yet!" She returned to her cooking. "Stop that… No… Isabela, you will remove your hand from my trousers this instant, or I will dump this hot grease on your head!" The pirate groaned, but complied. "Now, while you're waiting." She readjusted her clothing. "You can tell me all about this sixth month 'secret mission' you and Varric just returned from."

"Ugh. If I must..." She slumped down into a dining chair. "I'm going to give you the short version. If you want the long and half-lying version, ask the dwarf." She sighed. "Let me see, we met up with Alistair in Antiva City, we went to fin-"

Red turned around so fast her apron almost didn't follow. "Alistair? As in the King of Fereldan? What was he like?" She was all wide-eyed and full of wonder.

Isabela chuckled to see her so-not-interested-in-men partner star-struck. "If you must know, he was about as adorable as a baby mabari. Not all that bright, though. Anyway…" She rubbed her temple in frustration. "We were looking for the lost King Maric. Ran into a Prince. Broke into a jail. Went to the Tellari Swamps. Met a dragon. Met a witch. Killed the Prince. Went to Tevinter to find a blood mage. Killed an old enemy. Got captured by Qun'ari. Met the new Arishok. Attacked a fortress. Got stuck in the Fade. Found Maric. Killed the blood mage. Maric died. And the world was saved from a dragon-infested Tevinter." She pounded her fist on the table, ending the story.

The Champion just blinked for a few minutes, taking it all in. "And you didn't once think that I would have liked to have joined you?" She tapped her foot and crossed her arms.

"That's what you got from that entire story? We all nearly died a dozen times over!" She threw her arms up in surrender.

"That's exactly what I'm angry about." She plated the finished food and handed it to the Captain. "You left me with no information and nearly got yourself killed. If something had happened I wouldn't have even heard about it for months!" The pirate was busy stuffing her face. _The Qun'ari must not have fed her much. _"Do you realize how horribly heartbroken I would be if you died? You should! You nearly died back in Kirkwall!" The angry rogue threw her apron across the room and rubbed her forehead. "And for what?"

The swashbuckler cleared her throat. "Well… we both got a chest full of gold and jewels. Don't look at me like that. I'm not finished. The Qun'ari won't come after me anymore, either. That's not to say I want to visit their outposts, bu-"

Hawke crawled onto her lover's lap and kissed her. _I thought she was mad. What did I say?_ "You've finally cleared all of your debts!"

"Um… yes, I suppose." She blinked.

The larger woman cupped Isabela's chin. "You've forgotten your little promise, haven't you?" The tanned mariner thought hard for a second, but couldn't come up with anything. "You owe me babies."

The pirate's stomach sank and she grew instantly pale. _Shit! I completely spaced that agreement. _"I think I owe Merrill a book I borrowed. And… uh… I have one of Fenris' rings somewhere…" A finger was placed on her lips and the room suddenly felt cold.

The Champion of Kirkwall stared deep into her amber eyes. "We had a deal. 'If I'm still alive when the Qun'ari stop calling, you can marry me and we'll have as many pups as you want.' Those were your words, not mine, Rivaini." A look of disappointment flickered in Red's crystal blue orbs. She wanted to dissolve into that chair.

"To be honest, I was a little drunk when we had that conversation." Her lover squinted at her, clearly not amused.

"Obviously not too drunk, since you know exactly what conversation I'm talking about." _Touché. _Isabela did know precisely when that little discussion took place. It was the night they killed Castillon. Their whole group got completely besotted to celebrate her newfound freedom. And it was the day before the Battle of Kirkwall. She made all sorts of promises, not thinking she would be alive to fulfill any of them.

"But… we can't have… babies. We're both ladies, Hawke." That earned her a light smack to the back of her head. The woman picked up the empty plate and put it in the sink.

"You worry about the wedding. I'll worry about the children."

* * *

"YOU'RE GETTING MARRIED!" Merrill clapped her hands and bounced around the tavern. Varric spat his drink across the room. Fenris looked like he had just browned his trousers. Isabela rubbed her eyebrow, regretting ever getting into this mess.

"Sit down, Kitten. All this ruckus isn't helping my headache." She downed her third whiskey that afternoon.

Merrill sat down beside her, hugging the Rivaini's shoulders. "It's just all so exciting! The only human wedding I've ever been to was Aveline's. It was so dreadfully boring. It was all guardsmen and people we didn't know. But you're so fun! We could play games. Will there be dancing? I hope there's lots of dancing! And cake! And…" The little elf kept talking, but the Captain couldn't hear a thing. Her heart was pounding in her ears. _This isn't really happening. I'm gonna close my eyes… That didn't work. Shit._

Varric tapped the Dalish on the shoulder. "Give the woman some air. She's obviously freaking out." Merrill nodded and stood.

"I suppose it isn't every day that the Champion of Kirkwall marries the Pirate Queen of the Eastern Seas." She patted her tan shoulder. "If you need help, let me know."

"I, for one, am proud of you for finally making an honest woman of Hawke." Fenris raised his mug to Isabela.

"Can we just… talk about something else?" She waved the server over and got a refill. "So… Varric… how did it feel to have your bed back after all our time away?"

"I nearly forgot where my bed was. It was so dark by the time we got back that I wandered into Merrill's room on accident!" The two chuckled together.

"I didn't mind! I was surprised at first. But once I realized it was him, I was so happy! I jumped out of bed and hugged him so tight!" She re-enacted the embrace and the dwarf blushed like a Chantry woman in a whorehouse. Fenris and Isabela grinned, knowing that some detail was missing. When Merrill left to go shopping, the two cornered him.

"What did you do to my Kitten?" Isabela demanded, raising her dagger.

"I didn't do anything! Stop looking at me like that, Fenris. She…" He shook his head. "She kissed me." He looked up at them. "She jumped out of bed and kissed me right on the mouth! I didn't even see it coming!" They both took a step back.

"Bold." The tattooed elf returned to his seat.

"If it was just a friendly kiss, why are you redder than a rooster's comb?" The swashbuckler turned her head, giving him the 'ole one eye'.

"I may be a scruffy surface dwarf, but I'm not dead! A woman jumps out of bed in her smallclothes and kisses you…" He pointed to the Rivaini. "… You're going to feel… Something…" He sat down and guzzled his drink.

"By the Maker, you're sweet on her!" Isabela chuckled uncontrollably. Fenris looked like he was going to choke. "I always thought you were just being a father, or a big brother, or something... I didn't expect…" She had to stop herself from laughing. "Oh, Varric. Poor little thing has NO idea."

"No idea about what?" The Champion arrived in all her splendor. She was taking care of official business at the port that morning, and was wearing her somewhat more formal attire. The crimson-haired woman was absolutely gorgeous. She wore her hair back with a tie. The dark swirls on her cheeks made her bright blue eyes pop. Her thin white blouse would have revealed her tattooed torso, so she wore a black leather vest over it. It had a hawk embroidered on the rear in white thread. Her breasts were slightly showing, since the top was not laced all the way up. Her brown trousers were form-fitting, accentuating her curvy thighs and buttocks. And her black boots were the finest Antivan leather, hand formed and etched. Everything was the best that money could buy. _She has such good taste. _The pirate choked a bit. Fenris chuckled at the reaction.

"Our archer is in love with our mage." He pushed some thin white strands from his face.

"Is that so?" She sat next to her lover, watching her lick her lips, before sending a curious glance to Varric. "I hate to tell you, but you're… Well… You're no Mahariel…" She wiggled her finger and he caught her point. Isabela snapped back to reality so that she could enjoy the conversation. _She's so mine later. _

"But she kissed me!" He touched his lips. "And it wasn't just a peck. She didn't even try to move... It felt like forever." He blushed again, rubbing his scruff and looking down at his whiskey. He swirled it around with his other hand, but didn't drink it.

"I love Bianca as much as anyone…" The Rivaini placed a hand on the dwarf's shoulder. "… But if you really want to be with Merrill… I'm just… I'm sure she would want you to be happy." The bulky man nodded, stroking his crossbow gently. Then he shook his head.

"But where are my manners?" He looked over to Hawke. "I'm here talking about my love life, when I should be congratulating you! I heard there is a wedding to be had!" He knocked back his drank and ordered her one.

"Ah. Yes! About that!" She turned to Isabela. "Put this on." She handed the tan woman a ring. Realizing that all she was getting was a blank stare, she continued. "It's an engagement ring." Her lover just blinked, examining the piece of jewelry. It was a silver band with three black jewels. _Black diamonds…_

"I'm going to have to do this properly, am I?" She sat up from her seat and knelt before the confused pirate. She took the ring back for a moment, holding it up. "Will you, Isabela, Pirate Queen of the Eastern Seas, marry me?" She looked up into dilated honey eyes. The silence was deafening. Everyone held their breath. The couple was breaking into sweat. "This is the part where you say yes." She whispered, releasing a small grin.

_Andraste's dimpled ass-cheeks. This is really happening. Why is she looking at me like I just tripped over something? Shit! Everyone is looking at us. Say something, Isabela! _"Um… Yes." She shook her head. "Yes, of course." Her pale companion removed one of the rings from her hand and replaced it with the new one. The whole tavern cheered as the Champion stood.

"I have to… use the latrine." The swashbuckler darted to the facilities.

"Go hold her hair, Hawke." Varric chuckled to himself and clinked mugs with Fenris. Red nodded and followed her fiancée, knocking on the door of the lavatory.

"Sweetness, are you alright in there?" Hearing nothing, she walked in. Isabela was leaning into the sink, staring into the mirror. She was as white as porcelain. If she didn't know better, she'd think she just saw a ghost. "Are you ok? You look ill." She leaned against the wall a few paces away.

"I'm wearing the ring." The swashbuckler blurted out, sweat beading down her face.

"Yes, dear. Yes, you are." She pointed at her lover's finger.

"That means I'm having the babies." Her eyes grew even wider, if that was possible.

The Champion chuckled, closing the distance. "I'm glad you caught that." She placed her hand on Isabela's shoulder and leaned into her ear. "And you get to wear the dress."

_What in the Maker's name have I gotten myself into?_


	2. A Blooming Garden

Merrill wandered through the trading post. A fruit stand caught her eye. She walked over and glanced at the exotic melons, mangoes, and bananas. _I wonder if Varric would like-_

"Varric…" She whispered under her breath. She remembered their untimely encounter:

_The Keeper called to her. "Da'len! Please, join me in meditation." Her First sat beside her and closed her eyes. She missed the real Marethari, but she could see this one in the Fade. She was deep in meditation when she heard a rustling. She turned and opened her eyes, seeing nothing. _

_The rustling was coming from outside the Fade. "Time to wake up already?"_

_She began to pull herself out of her dream. She was drowsy, and sweaty, but she could hear movement. She shook her head, sat up, and grabbed her staff, but couldn't see through the darkness._

_"D-Daisy?"_

_She recognized the voice and dropped her staff. "Varric! You're back!" She snapped her finger and the fireplace lit itself. There he was, short, scruffy, and covered in hair. "You're back! You're back!" She jumped from the bed and hugged him. He was caught off guard, and nearly fell over. "I've missed you so much!" _

_Next thing she knew, her lips were on his. It took her a moment to realize that she was kissing him. She wondered why she would do such a thing. And why neither of them pulled away. They must both be in shock. He tasted like whiskey, and that was nice._

_Merrill pulled back first, finally remembering that she was dressed only in her smallclothes. "Oh, I'm sorry. I… I don't know what came over me…" The dwarf blinked, then shook his head._

_"It's ok, Daisy… I'm happy to… It's good to be home." _

_She hugged him again. "I'm so glad you're safe, Lethallin!" He held her, mumbling "you, too" before letting go. _

_"It's been a long trip, girly. I think I'm going to go to bed." He rubbed the back of his neck. _

_"Yes, yes!" She shook her head. "And in the morning, you can tell me the tale of your most recent adventure!" _

_He left the room with a smile on his face. Merrill crawled back into her bed, killed the magic flame, and snuggled into her pillow. She felt so giddy! In moments, she was back in the Fade. But this time, she and Varric were hiking through a forest…_

It wasn't until after she woke up that morning that she started to question her actions. She had never kissed anyone on the lips before. Well… except Mahariel… But she was sick at the time… Anyway, she was long gone. The Hero of Fereldan had to leave her clan, and once she defeated the Blight, she disappeared. No one had seen her in years.

"You gonna buy those bananas, or just stare at them all day?" The human merchant was frustrated with the distracted Dalish elf.

"Abelas! I'm sorry! Yes, one bunch please." She purchased her wares and was making her way back to the estate, when she walked straight into someone.

"Watch where you- Daisy!" Varric helped the elf pick up her dropped fruits. "Ooo, bananas!"

"Yes! I saw them in the market and I thought you would like them. And I've heard the food on ships isn't very good. And I didn't know how well the Qun'ari treated you, and-" She was mumbling on and on, a quality the dwarf found very endearing.

"Thank you, Merrill. That's very sweet of you." She smiled at him with those big green eyes, and he felt himself starting to blush. "Anyway, I'm glad I found you. I was afraid you got lost. It's nearly supper time." She looked up to the sky.

"Oh! So it is! I must have been stuck in my head for much longer than I thought!"

"Come on, Daisy. I'll walk you home." He was smiling again, just like he was the night before. She took his hand and leaned into him, allowing herself to be lead back home.

* * *

The next day, Hawke sought out Merrill. Isabela was in charge of planning their wedding ceremony, but Red needed a mage's touch to figure out the whole reproduction issue. She met the elf in the failed garden at the back of the estate. She was watering a patch of sand and cursing it in elven.

"The more you insult it, the less it will want to bud up and see you." The Champion chuckled.

"I suppose you're right." She put her watering can down and sat on the iron bench.

The larger woman sat beside her. "A little bird has been telling me things about you."

"A bird talks to you? Do they not know you're not a real hawk?" Merrill looked at her with a confused look on her face. Red laughed and shook her head.

"Not a real bird, dear." She put her hand on her shoulder. "Varric told me you kissed him last night. I didn't really believe him… but now that I see the color of your ears…"

"I… uh… I didn't really mean to. I don't think I was really aw-awake, and I…" The young woman was babbling incoherently, obviously more confused than the rest of the group.

"You don't have to explain yourself to me, sweetheart. I remember sixth months ago when you were all 'dareth shiral ma durgen'len' and 'mahvir falon'." She put her hands on her cheeks, trying to look like a girl with a crush. "Oh, you're ears are like rubies!" She ruffled her braids like Isabela would have and giggled. Merrill got all flustered.

"You speak enough elven to know what all that means! I was just saying goodbye!" She crossed her arms on her petite chest and pouted.

"Honey, I've nibbled enough ears to know when someone is being a flirt."

"You've nib-" She touched her pointed ears and gave the tattooed rogue a dirty look. "He's my friend, Hawke. He protects me. You know that."

"I protect you all the time too. Where's my kiss?" She playfully tickled her sides, making her squirm and giggle. After a moment, she released her, and they righted their clothing. "Regardless, I had no idea you had any interest in, well… men."

The elf was beet red again, and looked down at the sandy ground. "I… I'm not opposed to… I mean, I… He's nice… It's just, I… He's older and more experienced in these kinds of things, and I… I'm his da'assan, not his Bianca." She scratched at her braids.

"He called you his 'little arrow'?" She chuckled, rubbing her cheek. "Girly, you really are clueless." The girl turned her head in curiosity. "Human lore tells of a spirit that shoots arrows into young people, making them fall in love." She shook her head. "Plus, he's an archer. He loves anything that has to do with bows and arrows."

_So when he called me an arrow, it meant he liked me? Oh my! I might never have known! I thought he was just calling me a child… Though… he did let me kiss him…_

"Don't worry, Merrill. I won't tell him what you said in elven. Or that you called him old." The waif thanked her.

"Look, look! It's growing!" The elf pointed to a single leaf that was popping out of the sand. "I made it grow! I don't know how, but it grew! I've got to plant more!" She reached into a pouch and pulled out a handful of seeds.

"Maybe all this talk of love gave the flowers something to look forward to." She laughed.

"Oh! I hadn't thought of that!" The young woman moved from one side of the garden to the other, planting seed after seed. When she finally finished, she sat down on the bench and closed her eyes. _Varric has lovely chest hair. _Two sprouts popped up. _He always smells good. _A few more buds erupted. _He tells such interesting stories. Like the one with the princess in the tower. Oh, and the one with the griffons! And there was that tale he heard from the barkeep about the Giant One-Eyed Snake from Par Vollen!_

"Merrill, whatever you're thinking, you can stop now!" She opened her eyes and her jaw dropped. All of the flowers she had just planted were nearly a foot tall. "If you can grow a garden with your mind, you can help me impregnate a pirate!" The Champion gave a throaty chuckle. Merrill giggled a bit, and then tried to think of a way to help.

"I can turn you into a man… but I'd need a lot of-"

"No! No one is laying any gangly bits on my Rivaini! Not even me!" Red pointed to herself and shuttered. _Nasty male anatomy! Bleck!_

"Hmm… Do you still have that talisman? The… uh… flowery one…" Hawke thought for a moment. _The one that looks like a va-_

"Yes, I think I still do have that one. I was going to give it to Isabela as a joke on Feast Day." _She'd really get a kick out of that. _

"Well, it's a fertility talisman from Rivain… If I can magically enhance it… I might be able to perform a ritual or…" The elf scratched at her chin. _Or she could wear it, and we could see what happens. _"Yes, run inside and get me the necklace, and I'll see what I can do."

The rogue quickly ran inside, and in a minute she handed the trinket to Merrill. She hugged her for a while, lifting her tiny body off the ground and shaking her. They giggled together until they heard someone clear there throat.

"Am I missing something?" Varric raised an eyebrow to the friends.

"Yes, I was just going inside!" The Champion ran inside, leaving the sweethearts to chat.

* * *

Varric looked at the budding garden, then at Merrill. _Only she could grow a forest in the sand. _She was fixing her clothes after the overzealous hug she shared with Hawke. The dwarf just looked at her in adoration. She had begun to dress differently since Kirkwall; it was much warmer here, so she was able to wear fewer layers. Her dark green tunic was made of a thinner material. She wore light brown trousers underneath, and was completely barefoot. She always told Varric that she liked the feel of warm sand in her toes. She still wore long leather gloves to cover up her scars. _I'm so glad she doesn't use blood magic anymore. _And that silly green scarf that used to cover her chest and neck was now a makeshift belt. This revealed her slender, pale neck. His eyes rose up to her vallaslin, which traced her features, making her face all the more beautiful.

"Do I have something on my face?" Merrill crinkled her nose and touched her cheeks.

Varric shook his head. "No, no! I was just wondering… about these flowers." He coughed and pointed to the new vegetation.

"Oh! Hawke told me to stop cursing at the plants, and to think about nicer things." She sat back down on the bench, and he joined her.

"Whatever you thought about, it sure did the trick!" He glanced over to her. "So what was it? Puppies, kittens, oh, maybe daisies?" He chuckled.

"Actually… I thought about you-… your stories. Oh, and your chest hair!" She blurted out before she could stop herself. She covered her mouth with her hands and blushed.

"You… thought about my chest hair?" He put a hand over his heart. "And that made the plants grow?" He wrapped an arm around her shoulders. "That has got to be the strangest way to landscape!" She couldn't help but laugh with him. She leaned into him, placing her head on his strong shoulder.

"I don't mind, you know." She mumbled, still facing the garden.

"Don't mind what, Daisy?" He looked down at her raven braids.

"Your body hair. It's soft." She ran a pale hand over his lower arm, making him shiver. "It reminds me of the bear skin I used to sleep with." Those last two words made his heart do a backflip. _Is it just me, or did that bush not have buds on it before?_ She pulled her hand back. "Are you cold, Varric? You've got goosebumps. Where is your coat?" She looked up at him with innocence in her eyes.

"I'm fine. I was just thinking…" He gulped. "Last night… I-" He saw her blush.

"I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable… I just… I missed you, and-" She looked away, putting her head back on his shoulder. "Did you… like it?"

His pulse was pounding. _Did she really just ask…? _"I… uh… yes. It was… nice."

She sighed in his ear. "I'm glad. I thought I did it wrong or something." He gave a light chuckle at the idea. _I didn't know there was a wrong way. _"I didn't think you could think of me as a woman. I'm… I'm an adult as far as the Dalish are concerned." She looked up at him, putting a hand on her tattooed cheeks. "But… I am not very good with… human culture and… love, and things." _Love. She really said it. _"Why are you pinching your arm?"

"To make sure I'm awake." He rubbed his hand over his stubble. "As far as I'm concerned, I might be experienced my first dream." Merrill giggled, covering her mouth. "OW!" The elf yanked out a single chest hair.

"See? You're awake, I promise." He smiled. _Did that sapling just wave at me?_

* * *

"Young love, eh?" Isabela looked out the window to the couple in the garden.

"Oh, you leave them be!" Hawke glanced over her lover's shoulder. _Why is she being so nosy? It's not like we're trying to make wedding plans right now, or anything!_

"She just reached for his chest hair!" The Rivaini gasped. "Even I'm not allowed to do that! Ooo! That's so not fair." The woman stamped her foot in protest.

"I never understood your fascination with it." The pirate turned around and faced her fiancée.

"Of course you wouldn't. You don't like men." She put a hand on her lover's hip. "A man's hair can tell you a lot of things. Most importantly, the more hair he has the larger his… assets." She chuckled when Red made a disgusting face.

"But he's a dwarf! She's all short and stocky! That's just…" She shook her head violently.

"Try not to think about it too much, sweetness." She closed the distance between them, kissing her partner's pale lips. Hawke relaxed and cradled her close to her body. _I hope she's not thinking about manly things right now. That would be really insulting. _A tan hand reached up and cupped her breast while another squeezed her buttocks. _I suppose there's my answer. _She picked the smaller woman up and sat her on the end of the writing desk. She broke the kiss and closed the curtain.

"You get 10 minutes. Then we're going to send out these invitations." She began taking off her vest.

"Aye aye, Champion!"


	3. Dwarves Don't Swim

It didn't take long before Varric could hear the tell-tale signs that it was time to leave. Merrill began to blush as the… passions of the recently engaged couple grew louder behind them.

"If Hawke or Isabela were a mage, this garden would have grown ages ago." The young elf giggled, having actually made a good dirty joke.

"Come on, Daisy." He stood and took her hand. "Let's leave the ladies to play." He helped her up from the bench and they began to walk down the shore. It was a beautiful day. There wasn't a cloud in sight. Varric was just wearing his regular shirt, black boots, and brown knee length breeches. Fenris was on Sentinel duty, so he didn't even have Bianca with him. _She'd be jealous anyway. _

"Let's go swimming!" Merrill tugged on his hand, leading him toward the water.

"Uhm… Dwarves don't swim." He looked precariously at the water and dug his heels in.

"Oh… Well, we'll stay really close to the beach then." She nodded her head and flashed a playful smile. "Come on, Varric!" She grabbed his other hand and hauled him to the water's edge. She took off her over clothes and the dwarf just blinked at her. "Oh, don't look at me like that! I don't want to get my tunic wet." She rushed into the water in nothing but her smallclothes.

"Varric, you lucky duck." He mumbled to himself, taking off his boots and shirt. He left his breeches on… in case the water was cold. _Don't want to make the girl uncomfortable. _He dipped a single stubby toe into the water.

"Don't be a baby! It's fine, I swear!" The pale elf giggled and splashed water at him. She was wet from head to toe, and her body glistened in the sun. She was halfway in the water and she went deeper still when she noticed his staring.

"If you say so." He walked cautiously into the light waves. _The water is freaking freezing! _He made it up to his gangly bits before stopping.

"Are you scared of the water, Varric?" She walked up to him, seeing the strange look on his face. _How does one say 'my balls are icicles' without sounding like a creep?_

"Yeah. A bit." She walked up to him and grabbed his hands, leading him into the sea.

"If you just stand here for a second, you're body will adjust. And it's only up to your armpits, so you're not going to drown or anything." He closed his eyes, and in a minute he didn't feel cold anymore. He opened them again to see a smiling Merrill. "Better?"

"Yes, but… You have something…" He pointed at her lower arm, and when she looked down, he pushed her in the water. "Ha ha!" He ran the other way.

"You're going to pay for that!" She laughed, chasing him down the shore, splashing at him. Having longer legs, she caught up to him quickly and jumped on his back. She wrapped her limbs around him in a nugback ride. They laughed and he gripped her under the knees, making sure not to drop her, as he carried her to their pile of clothes.

"Ooo, it is soft!" She ran her hand down his chest hair. He nearly choked when she let out that playful giggle. His legs were trying to wobble.

"If you keep that up, Daisy, I'm likely to drop you." She pulled her hand back quickly.

"Abelas Varric." She nuzzled into his neck. "Your stubble tickles too." She rubbed her cheek against his and gave him a light kiss. He let her down near their clothes, no longer able to continue with her pressed up against him. Their underclothes weren't dry yet, so they laid next to each other in the hot sand.

"I'm glad you're not afraid of the water anymore." She rolled over and looked at him.

"If you asked me to, I'd stop being afraid of dragons." He laughed, throwing his arms behind his head. A sudden cold breeze blew in, causing them both to shiver.

"May I?" She moved closer to him. He nodded and outstretched his arm. She pressed her body against his side and sank her head in the crook of his shoulder. He laid his arm over her, being extra careful not to touch anything that might be sensitive.

"So, I remind you of a bear?" He looked down at her, recalling their conversation earlier.

"Oh, not a live bear, with claws and teeth and such! But I had a bear skin in my aravel that I used like a blanket. It kept me warm in the winter time, and it was so soft…" Her hand trailed over his chest again, and she looked up at him. He watched her bite her lip and his self-control broke. He reached over with his other hand and tilted her head up. Her lips parted a bit instinctively, and he bent his head down to meet them.

They both shut their eyes as they kissed. Everything about it was purposefully gentle. Varric stroked his thumb over her cheek and lightly ran his lips over hers. She tasted like spring; moist and earthy. He tasted like whiskey; smoky but sweet. She continued to pet his chest as she kissed him back. What she lacked in experience, she made up for in desire. She pressed herself against him, wrapping one leg over his waist. Her hand made its way to his scruffy jaw, and she forced their lips together harder. _By the Maker!_

She sucked at his lips and even slipped her tongue against his teeth experimentally. He buried his hand in her braids and slid his tongue over hers. The little yelp she made was unmistakably good. She shivered in delight and her body got warm. The dwarf was starting to get warm too, as well as… solid. He gave her one last kiss, then began to pull away. She made a low growling noise as their lips separated. When he opened his eyes, they were both red as roses and his little Daisy was staring back at him like a wolf stares at a halla. _I don't want to stop, _Merrill thought. _This is… nice. _

"I… Let's not rush into this." He stroked her cheek again, and her green eyes lost a bit of their hunger. She nodded and kissed his cheek. He glanced up at the beach. The sun was starting to crawl back into the sea. The couple watched the sunset.

"I think I like kissing." The elf said bluntly. "Tamlen always told me stories where dwarves slobbered like dogs. Now I know it's not true. You're not at all like a mabari." He chuckled at the comparison. "You're good at kissing."

"Ma serannas, da'assan." Hawke had taught him a little elven, mostly for eavesdropping purposes.

"If you teach me how to kiss like you, I'll help you learn to pronounce my language." She looked up at him with a glimmer of hope and a hint of mischief.

"A deal's a deal." He held out his hand and she shook it. "Though I really don't think you need any tutoring." He let out a light laugh.

"I'm sure I'll get better with practice." Merrill smiled up at Varric as nightfall broke.

_Andraste, you've got a weird sense of humor… But thank you._

* * *

"What about the blue one?" Hawke yelled through the door.

"Ugh! Far too long!" Isabela called back.

The two had been trying to get the Pirate Queen a proper wedding dress for two days. And, in the old human tradition, the Champion wasn't even supposed to see her bride wearing it. So she sent Merrill in to make sure the Rivaini didn't end up looking like a ruffled Orlesian mess on their wedding day.

"You should be worrying about what you're going to wear!" Her lover shouted.

"The mistress has a point, serah Hawke." Bodahn wagged his finger at her.

"You mean I can't wear my Champion armor?" The hero chuckled.

"NO! If I have to wear a damn dress, you have to at least wear formal clothes! And remember, Guard-Captain Man Hands is going to be here, so no funny business!"

"Don't worry, darling! I already have a plan!"

"That's what I'm afraid of!... OW! You poke me with that needle one more time…!"

"Don't mind Isabela. She doesn't mean it." Merrill stammered.

"Should I wear something different?" Varric asked the groom.

"My dear dwarf, if you try and cover your chest hair, all the guests will leave."

"You say the nicest things, Hawke."

"Am I right in assuming I can also wear what I please?" Fenris looked to Red.

"Tell Fenris he should wear nothing at all!" Her fiancée chimed in.

"Just wear clothes. Please." He nodded and she put her mouth close to the door. "You realize that you're marrying me and not the elf, right?"

"You didn't say I couldn't look!"

"Isabela! That's your Hawke out there! You should be staring at her on your wedding day!" The young Dalish elf defended her friend.

"Yeah! No ogling anyone but me!"

"You two are quite the pair." Varric shook his head and laughed.

"You're telling me…" the Champion sat by the door, trying to peek at her bride through the keyhole.

* * *

"Aveline and Donnic are arriving tomorrow! And they're bringing baby Isaac!" Merrill read and re-read the letter Hawke received from the ex-Guard-Captain. "Bethany and Sebastian said they would come! Oh, Tallis…. Well, she said she'd try. Zevran said 'it would be an unimaginable pleasure to see you two beautiful ladies again'. It's all just so wonderful!" She put her hands on her cheeks and shook her head.

"It's all so stressful, if that's what you mean." Isabela was working her way through a bottle of port. "Last time I got married I was traded for a goat and some silver."

"Was it a pretty goat?" Merrill turned her head in curiosity. The look she got said 'no'. "But this is going to be a real wedding! And all your friends will be there! I just can't wait!"

Varric wrapped an arm around her waist and kissed her temple. "The Champion of Kirkwall marrying the Pirate Queen of the Eastern Seas, on purpose no less. Some days I scarcely believe it. Any chance you're a desire demon?" He chuckled. She just glared back at him and filled another mug.

"Hawke bought you a ship. If you change your mind, you can flee." Fenris leaned back in his favorite tavern chair, his greatsword propped up next to him.

"Speaking of Hawke, where is your groom, Isabela?" _Groom_, Varric thought. _Never going to get used to calling a woman that. _

"She mumbled something about clothes at breakfast." Her fiancée gave an unconcerned look. "I need a break anyway. She's just as excited as Merrill is, but she shows it in a much more… physical way." She took another drink. "I'm just plain sore."

The little elf blushed. "Oh! Clothes! I'm late for a fitting!" She cursed under her breath and stood. "If I'm not back for supper, I'm probably lost." She kissed her dwarf's forehead.

He smiled from ear to ear. "Dareth shiral, da'assan." She nodded and skipped out of the bar, without a care in the world.

"Oh, Varric. You're positively glowing." The pirate jested from across the table.

"Some people appreciate the women in their lives." He darted a disappointed glance at her. _Ooo, now that's a bit harsh, _Isabela thought.

"Oh? And just how do you… appreciate our Merrill?" She made it to the bottom of her bottle, but she didn't seem too heartbroken. The conversation had taken an interesting turn. "Have you been deflowering my Daisy?" She had a wry drunken smile. Fenris erupted into a loud series coughs, probably choking on something.

The storyteller turned a new shade of rouge. "Uh…no. I…" His eyes glanced around the room and his palms got sweaty. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath.

"How disappointing. I was going to ask for details. Kitten's been borrowing my books, you know." A tan finger pointed at the nervous dwarf.

"Maker's breath! That's why she-" He threw a hand to his sweaty brow.

"That's why she what, Varric?" Isabela got up on her elbows and her amber eyes, glazed over as they were, demanded a response. The male elf quickly exited, not wanting to be involved in something so inappropriate. "You can't just start a statement like that and leave me craving more." She licked her lips. "Tell your tale, dwarf."

"The other day we were kissing and she… she… uh… grabbed my stones." He looked down at the floor and rubbed the bridge of his nose. The Rivaini laughed so hard she nearly fell back in her chair. She was grabbing her side and hurting from the hilariousness of it all. Varric remembered it all in vivid detail:

_The night had come, the land was dark, and the moon was the only light he saw. He was sitting on the sofa. It was directly in front of a large window that looked out unto the sea. It was a truly gorgeous night; he'd never seen so many stars. The dwarf rolled up his latest story and placed it on the table beside him. _

_"Oh, you're still up!" He could hear Merrill behind him. He continued to stare out into the heavens. "I'm not disturbing you, am I?" He turned his head and looked behind him. There she was, in a thin green robe, her calves and lower arms were completely uncovered, and she was looking at him with those innocent eyes. The moonlight bounced off of her fey complexion, and she practically glowed in the dark._

_"No, of course not, Daisy." He patted the spot next to him. "Join me." She nodded and sat next to him, staring out at the freckled sky._

_"It's beautiful tonight, isn't it?" Her eyes were full of boundless wonder, and he could see the stars reflecting from her emerald orbs. _

_"Absolutely." His voice came out a little raspier than he had expected, and she glanced over at him. In a moment, she realized he wasn't talking about the view outside the window glass. She blushed and wrapped her arms around herself, biting the corner of her thin lip. He reached for her, arms encircling her shoulders and waist. He pulled her to him, pressing her to his side. She gasped at how warm he was without his shirt._

_He smiled at her little noise, and gently touched his lips to hers. A pale hand rested on his heart. He pulled back from her face, not wanting to compromise the slow pace of their relationship. She kissed his cheek and stayed there._

_She whispered into his ear. "Tell me a story, Varric." And for once, he couldn't think of a single tale to tell. But he couldn't disappoint his Dalish elf. Time to make something up._

_"Once upon a time, in a far away land, there were two groups of travelers. They were both headed for the same village to sell their goods. A group of ten blacksmiths came from the South, bringing shields, armor, and weapons. A group of ten healers from the North brought potions, salves, and herbs. The two lived so far apart that they only know of each other from minstrels' songs, so when they met at the same merchant's shop, it was quite a sight to see._

_The thin pale healers cursed the short dark smiths. They called them brutes and warmongers, having heard the tales of their bloody battles in the South. The smiths cursed the healers. They called them weak and ignorant, having heard that they would rather hide in the forest than fight their neighbors in the North."_

_"Well, that's not very nice." She breathed against his stubbly cheek. _

_"No, it wasn't. But one member of each party refused to take part in the demonstration. A young male smith named Kor, knowing that minstrels' songs were rarely accurate, refused to insult the healers. A young female healer named Faun, understanding that traveling tales left out much detail, refused to insult the smiths. The two separated from their groups and walked out of the shop. Both could tell that a fight was going to erupt at any moment, and neither wanted a stake in it. _

_Kor had never seen someone so beautiful as Faun. Her skin was as bright as pearls, and her hair as dark as the purest flint. Faun had never seen someone as handsome as Kor. His hair was pure gold, and his skin shimmering sand."_

_"And they fell in love, and all that?" She rubbed her nose against his ear, squeezing him tight._

_"Well, yes, but you've skipped to the end! You missed the part where they brokered peace and decided to meet in that village every year and tell their own tales, so that they would learn to understand one another." He laughed at the young elf's impatience._

_"I think I like my version better." She giggled._

_"Oh? And how does yours-" He got his answer immediately. She turned his head and kissed him. He was a bit shocked. She was usually not this bold. She pressed herself against him, burying her hand in the locks near his heart. Her thighs grew tight against his hip, and he lost the ability to think clearly. She began to stroke her tongue against his, and he cradled her head. Maker, she's getting good, he thought._

_His other hand ran up and down her side, enjoying her warmth and the texture of her silken robe. She tightened her grip on his heaving chest, and she continued to assault his mouth. The dwarf couldn't help but reach up with his broad hand and feel her breast. It was barely enough to fill his hand, but it was unbelievably soft, even under two layers of cloth. She moaned into his mouth. The sound made his eyes fly open. He'd never heard such a wonderful noise. He could feel himself starting to sweat._

_He continued to massage her breast. Her lips started to trail to his scruffy jaw, then landed on his neck. He had to inhale sharply. She was pushing her chest into his hand, and he rubbed his thumb against a barely noticeable peak. She shivered and moaned against his throat. Maker help me, I love that sound, he thought. As her tongue flicked over his pulse, her hand began to wander. She stroked his stomach and his sides. And in a moment of pure lust, she placed her hand on his crotch. He hissed and shuttered against her palm. He was an absolute rock, and he could feel himself throbbing. _

_The seemingly unpleasant noise he made stopped Merrill in her tracks. She opened her eyes and pulled herself, and her hand, back. "I'm so sorry! Did I hurt you, Varric?" She was deeply flushed, but her face held real concern. It took him a moment to catch his breath. His hand fell back to her side. _

_His throat was dry. "No… I'm fine…. I just… wasn't expecting…" He glanced down at his breeches. It had been so long since someone touched him. He was amazed he hadn't burst the seams. _

_"Abelas, ma durgen'len. I wasn't thinking." She rubbed the vallaslin on her forehead. "I just wondered… If it's like my ears…" She was stammering, and it took him a moment to catch her meaning._

_"It's… uh… sensitive, yes." He shook his head. "But I don't want to go this fast, Daisy. You've never… and I don't want to hurt you…"_

_"You would never hurt me, Varric! Why would you say something like that?"_

_"Your first time… can be a little uncomfortable, at first…" He glanced at her eyes, then at his pants. "I'm not… small." She turned deep red in understanding._

_"I… I had noticed…" She was breathing funny. "Let's just… go slow again, yes?"_

_"Yes, that would probably be… wise." He was finally able to breathe normally. "I think I should…" Relieve this aching from my loins, he thought. "…go to bed."_

_"Oh, yes. I kept you up. I'm sorry." She shook her head and stood, allowing him to do the same. He pressed a quick kiss to her forehead._

_"Sweet dreams, da'assan." He quickly ran to his bedroom and took care of his need before falling into a deep sleep. _


	4. The Ceremony

"You're here, you're here!" Merrill shouted at the top of her lungs, flinging herself at Aveline. She and Donnic had come all the way from Fereldan for Hawke's wedding.

"Merrill! I've missed you!" She picked the elf up, hugging and shaking her.

"Big Girl." Isabela nodded. Red gave the ginger a look, making her avoid choice words.

"Pirate." She placed the elf back down, watching her run over to Varric. "It's good to see all of you again. You all remember Donnic, of course." She reached into her husband's arms, and brought back her child. "This is Isaac." Her son was just a baby. His chubby cheeks and light brown hair were the most adorable thing the Champion had ever laid eyes on. He was wearing brown overalls with a little white shirt underneath. The look on Aveline's face as she held her sleeping offspring to her chest… Hawke wanted to feel like that.

"Thank the Maker. He looks like Donnic." The swashbuckler chuckled, and her fiancée gave her a quick elbow to the ribs.

"Ignore my bride. May I?" She held her palm up, gesturing to the baby. Aveline smiled and passed her child to the waiting arms.

"Motherhood suits you." Fenris smirked. The group agreed.

"Well, let's not stand on the docks all day, cooing at little squishy things." Isabela joked.

"Oh, look who we found!" Aveline pointed her thumb to the ship, which was still off-loading passengers. There were a few familiar faces in the gaggle.

"Bethany! Sebastian! Tallis! Zevran!" Merrill screamed, releasing her dwarf's hand and bolting to her friends. They each earned overzealous hugs. "Everybody is here!"

"It turns out that this is the only passenger ship that comes to this island this month. Along the way, we all just seemed to end up aboard." Donnic laughed, reclaiming his son from Hawke.

"Sister!" Bethany ran up to her sibling, throwing her arms around her and nearly knocking her on her ass. "I couldn't miss your wedding! Not in a million years!" The two hugged as everyone greeted each other. There was a lot of hugging and hand-shaking and friendly pats on the back. Humans, elves, a baby, and a dwarf. _Quite a weird wedding party, we_.

"Come! I'll show you all the guest house!" Varric motioned his head in the direction of the estate. "Then we can all enjoy a meal, just like the old days!"

The group made their way through the docks and to the estate. Red noticed the way the group broke itself up. Herself and Isabela, Aveline's family, Varric and Merrill, Tallis and Bethany, Fenris and Sebastian and Zevran. _I doubt that they even realize their segregation. That last groups brings up… an interesting thought. _

"There are enough rooms for everyone, so don't worry about doubling up." She looked at the three man group. "Unless you want to…" Sebastian looked at the other two men, and began walking ahead of them, no longer wishing to associate. Isabela laughed at her bride's jest. "I'll show you each to your suites, and then we'll meet at the dining room in the main house for supper. I'd take you all to the tavern, but I want everyone to be sober for the wedding." She pointed to her pirate. "Especially you."

Within a few hours, the dining room was a roaring party. They had brought in the dining tables and chairs from the other houses and formed a surface long enough for everyone. There was ham, turkey, a menagerie of side dishes, fruits, pies, cakes, and wines. The Champion kept an eye out, making sure no one had more alcohol than was sociable. It reminded her of the night before the Battle of Kirkwall. If Anders had not of died, the same group would be present. It didn't feel all that different. Except that Aveline and Isabela were actually getting along. The Pirate Queen was making funny faces at Isaac and making him laugh. That was a joyous sight to be seen, considering they too would have children soon enough.

And Merrill was sitting in Varric's lap, adding commentary to the stories he was telling. Something wicked was certainly going on between Fenris and Zevran. The way they were talking to each other was excessively polite, especially for the king of brooding. Bodahn and Sandal ran between the kitchen and dining room, tending to Maximus' dinner as well as theirs. No matter how many times Red reminded them that they were not servants, they still chose to act that way. At least she had done most of the cooking, with small amounts of assistance from her pirate, whose main tasks were stirring or cutting. _My whole flock: thieves, princes, slaves, pirates, merchants, swindlers, assassins, soldiers, and mages. We're on odd bunch, truth be told, but I love every single one of them. _

The Champion stood to propose a toast, tapping a spoon against her full wineglass. "To friends and family! Past, present, and future!" Everyone held up their glasses. "And may our enemies walk with a limp, so that we may see them coming!" A volley of 'here-heres' erupted, and everyone drank.

As the evening wore on, the food was in shambles and people began to excuse themselves. Zevran and Fenris lounged by the fire. _Talking_ _about manly elfy things,_ Hawke suspected. Merrill and Varric were curled up in a chair asleep. And the engaged couple was still sitting at the table.

Seeing her groom distracted, Isabela reached for her hand. "I think it's time for us to turn in, sweetness." She pulled Red up, leaning into her as she stood. "One more night of pre-marital bliss couldn't hurt." She gave her a wicked glance and kissed her.

The rogue held her Rivaini close, reveling in her softness, enjoying the gentle passion in her kiss. Isabela always thought she would get bored bedding the same person for any measurable length of time. But the more time they spent making love, the better they each became at pleasuring the other. And more than that, they would just lie together afterwards, talking as old friends do. Six months away had reminded the swashbuckler of just how much she loved Red.

"You're still going to be here in the morning, right?" Her lover said between kisses. Hawke earned a slap on the ass for her comment. "Just checking."

* * *

The day had finally come, and Hawke had never been so nervous. Her bride was already dressing at the other end of the house. She was running things over in her mind. _Cake, banquet, officiator, band… _She swore she was missing something, but it was too late to think of it. She took a look in the mirror. _Isabela's going to drool like a mabari._

Her hair was simply pulled back. Its length really didn't allow for much else. Her top, if you could call it that, was something she had heard Qun'ari women wear. It was pretty much two crossed pieces of black fabric that covered her breasts. Her large tattoos showed quite clearly underneath. _She's gonna love that. _Her dark brown trousers ended at the middle of her calf, and her black boots covered the rest. Over that, she wore a crimson coat, much like the blue one Isabela wore at sea, except that the Hawke family crest was embroidered on the back. A belt clung from one hip to the other thigh, where her dagger was sheathed. _Someone has got to deal with wedding crashers. _She looked much like the captain of a marauder ship. And completed the look with a black three-pointed hat. _I look like a bloody pirate; and a damned sexy one, at that. What a lovely reversal of roles!_

She took a deep breath and made her way to the other side of the mansion. She stood outside the room that Isabela was dressing in. "Are you about ready, love?"

"You're not going to change your mind, are you?" The husky voice came from the other side of the door.

"No. Are you going to leave me altar?" She jested.

"Not without marrying you first!" She could hear her Rivaini laugh.

"I'll see you outside, Isabela." She kissed her hand and touched the door, before making her way to the courtyard. There was an archway where the estate met the beach, and a long red carpet leading directly to it. A band stood off several paces left of the carpet, and Maximus stood in front of them; luckily, they didn't seem to mind. All of her friends were there by the archway, gawking at Red's strange choice in wedding clothes.

"You humans are so strange." Fenris mumbled as she walked past. He was wearing simple black breeches and a white top. He, and most of the others, were barefoot in the sand. Varric wore his everyday garb. Merrill wore a light green knee-length dress with gold embroidery around the edges. She even ditched her usual gloves, but her scarf was still an effective belt. Bodahn and Sandal wore velvet red and gold tunics and trousers, the kind they usually saved for Feast Day. Tallis wore a dress very similar to Merrill's, though, like Hawke, she still had a dagger strapped to her leg.

Aveline, in a funny twist, wore her Guard-Captain uniform, as did Donnic. Isaac wore small brown pants and a red shirt, safe in his father's arms. _He is ridiculously adorable. _

"Really, Ave?" She pointed to the burly woman.

"Don't look at me like that. I wore a dress to my own wedding already." She chuckled. "And take a look at yourself. You look like a pirate wh-… captain."

"Now, now, dear. We are guests." Her husband placed a hand on her shoulder, silencing her. Donnic nodded to Red, who nodded back.

Sebastian stood behind the archway, Chant in his hand. He too was wearing his favorite white armor. Bethany and Zevran stood next to him, her sister wore dark blue mage robes, and the elf wore a dark and gold tunic and trousers. _Figures. Always a mage._

"Sister! You look… different." She was staring somewhat uncomfortably at her older sister's barely hidden chest. The older Hawke laughed.

"Ah, Hawke. I did not realize this was a pirate themed wedding, or I would have changed. I could be your cargo!" He gave a throaty chuckle. She gave him an unamused look. "If you're ready, I will fetch your bride."

"Yes, everyone in their places!" Sebastian called.

"Bethany, Varric, Tallis, Bodahn, Sandal, you're on my side. Merrill, Fenris, make sure there is space in front of you for Zevran. And Aveline… You're on Isabela's side as well." The ginger got wide eyed and opened her mouth to argue. "As you've reminded me, it's my wedding." The brute crossed her arms. "Oh, don't get all pouty. We all know that deep down in that warrior's heart you've missed her. Without Isabela, you'd have no one to be mad at all the time! How you've survived the last two years is beyond me." The groom grinned, having made her point. She could see the tiniest smirk on the ex-Guard-Captain's freckled face.

Just then, Zevran stuck his head out of the door and signaled for the band to play. _Stay calm, Hawke. Nothing to be nervous about. It's just like any other wedding between the Champion of Kirkwall and the Pirate Queen of the Eastern Seas. _He laughed out loud at herself. Which stopped immediately at the sight of her bride.

Isabela was wearing a true wedding dress, all white and embroidered. It was full length even! All the way to her feet, which were bare. She wasn't wearing a veil, or her bandana, or her earrings, or even her necklace, but she was wearing long white gloves. _I don't know who you are, but you're not Isabela. _Her tan skin was glowing in the midday sun. Her dark hair was down behind her ears, and there were small braids in the front. Her eyes glistened like topaz gems. She held a large bouquet of red roses to her chest. The Champion choked as Zevran led her up to the altar. _She's beautiful. _The music stopped, and her bride looked into her eyes.

"This is ironic, isn't it?" She handed the flowers to Zevran as he took his place, thus exposing the top of her dress. _That's Isabela, alright. I'd know those anywhere._ The Pirate Queen took a good look at her groom and smiled. _I don't know what in the Maker's name she was thinking, dressing like that. And stealing my hat, no less! But Andraste's flaming tits is she delicious right now... _She leaned in to whisper in her lover's ear.

"Hawke, the second this is over, I want out of this damned dress." Red chuckled, but nodded. They faced each other at the altar. Isabela, looking frustrated, pulled off her gloves, throwing them at Sebastian, who laid them across his shoulder.

Sebastian cleared his throat. "Have you the rings?" The Champion got a crazed look in her eye, realizing the small detail she was forgetting that morning.

"Enchantment?" Sandal walked up the carpet to the altar, rings in hand.

"Thank you, Sandal." Red tried to make it look like he was meant to be a ring-bearer, and nodded at him to take his place again. Then she and Isabela held hands.

Sebastian cleared his throat and opened his tome. "Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today in the eyes of the Maker to join these two women in holy matrimony. Since I am the only devout Andrastian here, I'll try to skip ahead a bit. For some reason, the Champion of Kirkwall fell in love with the Pirate Queen of the Eastern Seas, and stranger still, she returned the sentiment." The group erupted into friendly laughter. "But today is not a day for judgment. It is a day for happiness and surrounding oneself with friends and family as you embark on a new journey together. So without further ado…"

He closed the Chant and looked at Hawke. "Do you, Red Hawke, take this woman to be your lawfully wedded wife, to have and to hold, in drunkenness and in sobriety, as long as you both shall live?"

"I do." She smiled at her Rivaini.

"And do you, Isabela, take this woman to be your lawfully wedded wife, to have and to hold, in wealth and in poverty, as long as you both shall live?"

"Shit, why not?" She laughed. "Let's hope it doesn't come to that last part, though."

"If anyone has anything to say, now would be the time." Sebastian looked out at the crowd.

"Sister, I'll always love you, no matter how many strange women you marry." Bethany shook her head and smiled.

"Let them kiss already!" Merrill yelled, instantly covering her mouth with her hands and turning deep red. She looked over at Varric. "I said that out loud, didn't I?" The wedding party laughed together.

"You're blooming mad, Hawke! But if it keeps her out of trouble, hurry up and marry her!" Aveline pointed to the bride and more laughter erupted. Even the band was laughing now.

"Alright, alright! I now pronounce you legally insane, now stick the rings on and kiss before the crowd tries to kill me!" Sebastian hid his face behind his tome.

"I love how no one complained about my choice of spouse." Isabela slid the gold band onto Red's finger.

"Oh, please. I'm quite the catch." The Champion slid the gold band over her lover's black diamond engagement ring. She pulled the smaller woman toward her, placing a hand on her cheek. The Rivaini wrapped her arms around her groom's waist, and got up on tiptoes to kiss her. The moment they kissed, they forgot where they were, and they leaned hopelessly into each other, lips dancing.

Sebastian cleared his throat loudly as the guests 'oooed' and 'awwed'. Reluctantly, they let go, but Red earned a slap on the ass. The band began playing again as the married couple walked arm in arm toward the mansion.

"We'll meet you all in the dining room in an hour. Please, amuse yourselves!" The bride called, sending a quick wave over her shoulder. Once they got through the front door, the race was on. They untangled their arms and ran up the stairs as fast as they could.


	5. The Reception

The newlyweds reached their bedroom just in time. Once they shut the door Isabela was clawing her dress, trying to rid herself of the big white inconvenience.

"Hold still!" Hawke pulled out her dagger and made a swift cut down her wife's bosom, opening the dress up like a butterfly's wings.

"Thank the Maker! This thing is such a nuisance!" She finished ripping the dress in half.

"Isabela!" It turned out all she had on under her gown was a garter and a belt knife.

"Shut up and get naked!" The Rivaini grabbed the captain's hat and threw it across the room before tossing herself on the bed. Red quickly removed her belt, jacket and boots. Her top came off easily enough, but she fumbled with her trousers. "Get over here!" The dark-haired pirate sat on the end of the bed and grabbed her lover's hips, forcing them to fall back on the mattress. She peeled the larger woman's trousers off and flung them across the room. The two crawled to the center of the bed, Isabela still lying on her back.

"Now, where were we?" Hawke hovered over her bride, scooping up her chin and leaning down for a kiss. Isabela dug her nails into her lover's waist and pulled her body down, forcing skin to skin, then wrapped her legs around her pale hips. The rogue appreciated the intention and cupped a large tan breast as their tongues did battle. But that belt knife was digging into her kidney, so Red reached back and threw it across the room, playfully snapping the garter. She reached back up and rubbed a thumb over her nipple. The captain wiggled against her tattooed companion, urging her to get to work.

The Champion broke the kiss, trailing her lips to the Rivaini's uncovered neck. She licked and nibbled, stroking her hand down the length of her sun-kissed body. She tore the white garter off before reaching between muscular thighs. _It should be a crime to be so wet on your wedding day. _Her lover grabbed at her upper arms and rolled them over. Isabela pushed her weight down onto the pale fingers, then buried her hands in crimson hair. She was up on her elbows, riding Hawke's fingers as her breasts were sucked and nibbled violently. The pirate loved taking her pleasure like this; nothing but moans and the sound of flesh pressing together.

Red let herself be used, barely moving her hand as her spouse thrust upon it, enjoying the feel of nails digging into her neck. But it was taking too long. She released a third finger and used her free arm to force the wide hips down harder. She bit down a bit on the dark nipple, and she heard loud cries. But her arm continued the rhythm, making her lover ride out the storm (pun intended). Before long, Isabela's exhausted body lay limp over Hawke's.

"This is no time for sleep, my love. We've got guests to attend to." The pale rogue pulled her hand away, and gained a low growl.

"Give me my damned hat and we'll go again." The Rivaini was nearly breathless as she rolled onto her back and off of her wife.

"Yes, dear."

* * *

Downstairs, the wedding party was grabbing plates of food from the banquet table, eating and drinking at their own leisure.

"It's been over an hour now. Are you sure they're up there? Maybe they took off to celebrate their honeymoon already." Sebastian seemed somewhat impatient, twirling his glass of wine.

"I'll go see." Zevran walked to the top of the stairs and held a hand to his pointed ear. "Si! They are here… And if I'm right… they are almost done." He smiled, rejoining the group. "Very vocal, those two." Merrill and Aveline blushed, everyone else just laughed quietly.

"They had better clean up real quick. Maximus is eying the cake." Varric patted the mabari's head, slipping him a small piece of ham. They party continued to chat amongst themselves for a while. The noise upstairs grew louder for a moment. An exacerbated "CAPTAIN" sent giggles throughout the house. A few minutes later, the newlyweds made their way down the stairs, arm in arm, wearing their every day clothes. Isabela actually looked like herself again. Tunic, jewelry, bandana, and all. Red wore a burgundy top and black breeches.

"What about your wedding gown?" Merrill asked nicely and they made their way to the banquet table.

"Kitten, I regret to inform that it lay in tatters on the floor." Hawke jested.

"That's my line! But it's true. It didn't last a second against our Champion." Isabela kissed her wife as she grabbed for a bottle of Antivan brandy.

"Oh stop it. I think I'm going to barf!" Bethany made a sickly face at her sister, before chuckling wildly. "You two are just too cute."

"Had you my ears, you would sing a different tune." Zevran winked at the mage.

"There will be plenty of time for singing and dancing in a moment. Just let Hawke eat something." Aveline shooed everyone away from their leader.

"Oh, I'm fine Av! I positively gorged myself earlier." The look in her eyes told the entire group she didn't mean food. The sound Fenris made, halfway between laughing and choking caused a fit of giggles and blushes.

"Can we cut the cake now?" Tallis pulled out her dagger, offering it the groom with a bow.

"Of course, of course!" Hawke and Isabela walked over to the large white confection. They both held the blade and pushed through the cake, then the bride took over and cut slices for everyone else. She grabbed a piece of the dessert in her hand, and while Red was distracted, she smooshed it against her lover's face. Only about half of it ended up in her mouth, the rest occupied the lower half of her cheeks. The Pirate Queen cackled in laughter, throwing her head back, before ending up with a face full of cake. Red licked her lips and the whole group grew silent in anticipation. The look on the Rivaini's face was priceless, halfway between ferocious and confused. Retaliation seemed inevitable.

"Is the cake good?" Merrill innocently spoke up, breaking the silence. Hawke laughed and licked her fingertips.

"Yes, it's actually quite wonderful." She grabbed her wife's waist, pulled her close, and licked the frosting from her chin. Isabela just laughed, allowing herself to be cleaned like a cat.

"I think I'll just eat mine with a fork, if you don't mind." Sebastian guided them out of the way, grabbed a small plate, and retrieved his slice. Everyone grabbed their piece in turn and sat back at the long table. Everyone had finished their slice fairly quickly, as it was quite good. It had a sweet but lemony taste, with a buttercream frosting. They looked up at the head couple. They're faces were clean, but they didn't seem to notice as they continuously kissed.

"Shall we dance?" Varric called. The Champion's lips left her partner's, and she nodded. The band began to play a slow song. A large area had been cleared in front of the fireplace, and a tan carpet had been laid out. The crimson haired woman led her swashbuckler to the floor. She took a slight bow and held her hand out.

"A dance, milady?" A wicked grin passed over her dark lips.

"We've already done that once today." But she took her hand anyway, and they got into a proper ballroom dancing position. Red took lead, and they began to twirl around the room, holding each other like only long-time lovers could. _They must have practiced a lot! It's like the love stories you tell children. Except that they're both women. And they're not princesses. And they're not wearing fancy dresses… _Merrill continued to mumble in her head.

"Aren't any of you going to join us? Or shall we dance the night away alone?" Isabela called to the crowd.

The group broke into couples. Aveline and Donnic danced while holding Isaac. Varric and Merrill made their way to the dance floor. The dwarf had two left feet, but they kept the pace slow, happy to just hold each other. _I've never seen him so at ease, _Red thought. Sebastian and Bethany took to the dance floor, careful to stay at an arm's length. Zevran and Tallis danced, chatting as they moved with the music. Bodahn and Sandal cleared the large table, choosing, once again, to separate from the group. Fenris leaned up against the dining room table, watching the scene. Maximus nudged his knee.

In a fit of laughter, he picked the dog up in his arms and swayed around the dance floor. The whole group laughed as the Little Wolf strutted with the big hound, who howled to the band. _No one is ever going to believe that he would do something so… well, silly! _Merrill kept her giggling up the longest, as everyone continued to dance. Varric kissed her cheek and she quieted a bit.

"How about a group dance?" After a few minutes, Hawke signaled the band and the couples separated into two lines, men and women. This time, Isabela demanded that another dwarf be present, so that the lines would be equal. Maximus was left to keep Isaac and Sandal company. The group began to clap rhythmically as Red and Sebastian took a step in, bowed, and linked arms. They skipped and circled, laughing whole-heartedly at the silliness of it all. They made their way to the end of the line, unlinked, bowed, and the dance continued.

Zevran and Isabela paired, then Fenris and Bethany, Varric and Merrill, Bodahn and Tallis, and Donnic and Aveline. By the end, they were all shuffled. Women danced with women, men danced with men, and laughter was abundant when Aveline danced with Pirate Queen herself. There were no longer lines, and everyone began to do whatever dance they pleased with whomever they pleased. Even the band sensed the chaos, and played more upbeat and faster music.

Somehow, the newlyweds ended up on the table, stomping and turning and attempting to sing. The mabari even found a new dance partner, with an excited "Enchantment!" As the evening began to wear down and the wine bottles began to empty, most of the group exchanged stories at the long table. Varric was telling a harrowing tale about how Fenris ripped a man's heart out. Merrill noticed quite quickly that he was missing. She grabbed Tallis' hand and searched for him.

"If this a rescue mission, or reconnaissance?" The rogue elf asked.

"I don't know yet." They heard strange sounds from the bathroom. They pressed their pointed ears against the door, wondering if they should break the door in and save their companion. They listened for a moment and began to turn red. Fenris was in there, but he was not alone. Based on the accent, Zevran was keeping him entertained.

"What are you two doing?" Isabela looked down at the snooping elves, then put her head against the doors. "Oh… I see." She sauntered off toward the dining room again. The young women felt that they probably shouldn't listen anymore, but as they began to stand, the entire wedding party showed up.

"Why are we standing around the water closet, again?" Hawke asked her lover.

"It seems two of our elves have found something more interesting than Varric's adventurous tales." The group first looked down at the female elves, but then realized that wasn't who she was talking about. Aveline, Donnic, Bodahn, Sandal, and Sebastian walked off, not wanting to be part of this perversion.

"Merrill, my elven is a little rusty. What is he saying?" The Champion had her head up against the door.

"I'd rather… not repeat that." Tallis nodded her head in agreement. Varric and Bethany laughed a bit too loud, and everyone had to scurry away from the door before it opened.

"I believe there is another latrine on the other end of this floor." Zevran said through the cracked door. He was obviously naked, and no one bit ashamed. "Unless… one of you would like to join us? Two, perhaps?" He looked at Tallis and Isabela.

"I don't think so, Zev." The Champion gave him an 'off-limits' look as he referred to her wife. "Besides, based on what I could translate, you don't need any help."

"You honor me with you words. Now, if you'll excuse me." He shut the door, and the group broke into laughter before walking off. The pirate took Merrill off to the side while everyone else went back to the dining room.

"I never took you for a voyeur." The Rivaini stated matter-of-factly as they entered the kitchen together. Bodahn and Sandal quickly left the room and headed off to bed.

"I didn't mean to snoop. I just… I noticed Fenris wasn't at the table, so I took Tallis to look for him. That's when we found him… in the bathroom." The little Dalish turned bright red and sat in a chair.

"Oh, no. That much was obvious. But once you realized what he was doing, you didn't leave." She gave a knowing look and sat herself on the counter.

"Well… I just… Varric and I haven't… and I've never… but I want to… and-" Isabela cackled at her Kitten's mumblings.

"So you thought you could learn something from hearing two male elves romp?" She had to wipe a tear from her eye. "Oh, Merrill… why didn't you just ask me? Maker knows I've slept with men of all races. Except Qun'ari. Don't make that face."

"I just… I didn't think Hawke would appreciate me talking to you about such things, since you don't… well, you haven't slept with a man in a while… I thought it would be a sensitive subject, and I-" She scratched at her braids.

"Kitten, hush for a moment. First, Hawke knows all about my previous… adventures, and she doesn't have a problem with my talking about it. As long as I don't scream the wrong name or ask for a freebie." Merrill tilted her head in confusion. "I know you don't know what I'm talking about, but that's not the point. Second, I am probably the only person with enough experience to answer your questions."

"I hadn't thought of it like that. But I suppose your right." The elf nodded her head.

"Now, what is it you want to know?" The captain put her hands on her hips and moved to sit next to her friend in the breakfast nook.

"I… uh… your first time… Varric said it hurts…" She was red from ear-tip to ear-tip.

"A bit. For a moment." The swashbuckler looked up at the ceiling, remembering how horrible her first time was. But it wasn't so much the pain as the lack of gentleness. Her husband used her and tossed her away like an old rag. She shook her head and her eyes met with the scared waif's. "Don't worry, Merrill. I'm sure he'll take it nice and slow. He cares a lot about you, even I can see that. And after that second of discomfort, it will be magical." She ruffled her young friend's braids and she began to giggle.

"Thank you, Isabela. Really. You're a good friend." She reached out and hugged the pirate, squeezing her as hard as she could.

"Oh, stop it. That's enough squishy emotional stuff for one day." She shook the girl, and then let her go.

"There you are! Everyone else is stumbling back to their rooms." Varric walked in and looked at Merrill, smiling as their eyes met. "Ready to go?" The elf stood, adjusted her clothing and took his hand.

"Ma serannas. Thanks again, Isabela." She gave a quick wave before leaving the kitchen. The Rivaini couldn't help but smile at how adorable they were as a couple.

"Go get him, Tiger." The Pirate Queen laughed before going to find her wife. After all the romantics, it was time for a good, old-fashioned tumble.


	6. Ma Da'assan

"It was all just so wonderful! The dancing, the music, the stories! I had so much fun!" Merrill was spinning through the courtyard, outstretching her arms like a child.

"Oh, Daisy. I wish I could see the world through your eyes!" Varric smiled, reaching for her hand.

"But wasn't it romantic?" He looked down at him, her emerald eyes shining and perfect.

"In Hawke and Isabela's own way, yes, it was." He laced his fingers through her's and she leaned against him.

"They make a lot of jokes, but they love each other. I just know they do." She sighed against his ear. "The way they look at one another. It's just… it makes me smile." She was smiling now. The moonlight shined against her skin, and she was so beautiful. The dwarf couldn't help but smile at the way she found the goodness in every thing and every one. She had a heart of gold. _Maybe lyrium, it's far more precious. _

"Me too, Daisy." She looked at his face. His smile was captivating. If she wasn't already grinning from ear to ear, seeing the happiness on his face would have made her smile. They had forgotten their destination and just stood, looking into each others' eyes. Merrill blushed a bit and bit her lip.

"Do you like my dress?" She reached down with one hand, pinching the end of the light green fabric at her knees.

"Of course, ma da'assan. You're beautiful." His thumb rubbed over her knuckle.

"You really think so?" She looked down at him. _How can she ask me that?_

"Merrill, I don't think I can describe in words how wonderful you are. Inside and out." He knew he was blushing now. His heart was thumping quickly, and his stomach fluttered. She was positively glowing, her vallaslin capturing his gaze. It traced her delicate features, which were slightly pink from the wine she had earlier. Or maybe it was just because he was staring at her. She shook her head a bit, closing her eyes for a moment.

"You're so sweet. And I know you're only kidding." She pulled his hand, forcing them to continue the walk to their house. "You're so good with words." _And with kissing. _

He opened the door to their building and the dwarf let the young elf to her room. He opened the door and released her hand. He was about to say 'good night' and go back to his room, but she spoke before he got the chance.

"I'm not really tired yet, Varric. Do you want to… sit with me? Just for a bit." She nibbled the corner of her lip. He had an aching suspicion as to why she was asking.

"Merrill… I… I really should-" He ran his hand over the back of his neck, fighting with his self-control.

"Please?" The hurt look in her eye made him want to get on his knees and beg her for forgiveness.

"Ma nuvenin, Daisy." He sighed and shut the door behind him. She sat on her bed and snapped her fingers to light the fireplace. It wasn't too cool yet, but it gave off better lighting than the four small candles in the room. He sat next to her, twiddling with his thumbs, uncertain as to her intentions.

"Your elven has improved." She looked at him. _He seems nervous. I guess I am too… _Her palms felt a bit sweat, and she kept nibbling on her bottom lip.

"I get a good amount of practice." He looked up at her, wondering why she was blushing so much.

"I… uh… You're welcome." She ran a hand over her braids. "I wanted to talk about… us… and our… courting." She was looking away from him, messing with her hair.

"I… didn't realize that's what this was." She looked at him, a strange angry, confused, hurt look in her eyes. "I don't mean… I just didn't know the term for… this… I'm not really familiar with a lot of Dalish culture…" _I sound like a damned fool. _

"Oh, I'm sorry… I'm not entirely sure about any of this either… I don't have a clan, or anything… And we're not betrothed…" _Oh, by the stone! That is what all this is about!_

"Merrill, I… we don't have to do anything you don't want to… I would never-"

"Oh, no, no. I don't know what I'm saying! I… Varric…" She shook her head and clawed at her braids.

"Would it help if I looked away? When I'm nervous…"

"No, no. I just… Have to find my words." She took a few deep breaths, then looked back at him. "I was talking to Isabela earlier. She told me about… what you said about lovemaking…" If she bit her lip any harder it was going to bleed everywhere.

"Daisy… I'd never rush into…" He rubbed his forehead, at a loss for words.

"But… I'd like to…" He looked back at her. Her eyes were all watery and she was ruby red. "That night when you told me that story… I liked that very much… I… I want to feel that again."

His throat got dry and he gasped for air. His pulse throbbed in his ears. The room started to spin. She just looked at him with those big green eyes. She moved closer to him, just a few inches from his face.

"Do you not want to…?" She placed a hand on her heart and he had to catch his breath to answer.

"I do. Maker, I do. I just… I don't want to hurt you. Not even on accident." He placed his hand over hers, pulling it away from her chest and onto his cheek.

"You won't, Varric. Please…" He ran her hand over his scruffy jaw. Her thumb rubbed over his bottom lip. She released her own lip before leaning in to kiss him. His heart broke at the softness of her mouth. She was so gentle, rubbing his jaw and gliding her lips against his. He cradled her head and returned her kiss. She pulled her legs up onto the bed and started to press herself against his side. She released him for a moment.

"You… you can touch me… if you want." She was sitting on her knees on the bed. He sat back on the bed, crawling so that he was sitting up against the headboard. He held his hands out and she took them, moving to sit on his thighs.

"Only if you promise to stop me if you feel any pain." She nodded then placed her hands on his furry chest. He wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling their bodies closer together. "I love you Merrill." He looked up into her eyes, she was smiling so magically.

"I think I love you too." She kissed him just once. "I'm sure I do." That's exactly what he needed to hear. He kissed her, pressing them together and stroking her back. She petted his chest, leaning into his embrace. She loved the feel of his heart pounding under her fingers. She deepened the kiss, running her tongue over his and enjoying the way his heart thumped even louder. _She is __**really**__ getting good at that. _

Her hand began to tug at his shirt. He loosened his arms slightly and broke contact with her lips. She had that hungry look in her eye again, and he shivered a bit when she lifted his shirt over his head. She looked down at his bare skin and her hands ran across his chest and his muscular abdomen.

"You wear such baggy clothes… they don't do you justice." His stomach was completely flat, and she enjoyed how warm it was. She stopped before she reached his pants. The last time she had touched him… it didn't end so well. He held her slides, gently stroking her with his thumbs. She felt embarrassed for a moment. He was nearly naked, and she was still dressed. She reached down and untied her scarf-belt, then set it on the table nearby. She reached for the bottom of her dress, but Varric grabbed her hand. He leaned in and kissed her again.

She felt the heat coming from his body through her thin dress. Her hands returned to his chest. They kissed for what felt like forever. It began as a simple distraction, but it was growing more passionate by the moment. His hands began stroking her lower back and buttocks as her nails dug into his chest. His hands stroked down her thighs and she wiggled with excitement, nibbling at his lower lip. His hands slid back up her legs, this time under her dress. She inhaled sharply as his broad hands touched her uncovered bottom. He pulled back a bit, but didn't move his hands.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to-" She placed a finger on his lips, then reached down and pulled her dress over her head. His eyes grew wide as he looked at her in her smallclothes. He'd seen them before, felt them before, after they went swimming, but he'd never got to just look at them this closely. The top looked like a single piece of fabric that looped around and crossed. He had no idea how it worked. She could see the confusion in his eyes, and she grabbed his hand, leading it to the red tie in the front. He pulled slightly, and it started to unravel. Her pale skin was slowly revealed, and his eyes couldn't help but to focus on her chest. He remembered feeling it that night on the couch. _That noise she made…_

She pulled the fabric away, then pressed his hand to her ribs. His hands seemed extremely large on her tiny body, covering nearly her entire side. He left his hand there for a moment, enjoying the warm silky flesh. His other hand laid on her other side. She pressed herself against him, kissing his forehead. He stroked the undersides of her breasts with his thumbs, enjoying the little giggle she made. Apparently, she was a bit ticklish. He leaned his body back a bit and she kissed his neck. His hands began to stroke up and down her sides. She was so delicate, he didn't dare apply any pressure.

But as his hands cupped her breasts, she moaned against his neck again and his loins ached. She sucked at his throat and when his thumbs met her nipples she bit down a bit and pressed her body weight into his lap. He bit his lip, not wanting to make a noise and stop her enjoyment. She tangled her fingers into the hair on the back of his neck and rubbed her breasts against his large palms. The sighs she let out were incredible.

"Please…" It was the smallest whisper against his ear. He was sweating and his cock was unbelievable hard. She was rubbing herself against him. He brought her lips back to his and gave her a hungry kiss. Her thighs squeezed tight around him and it took the dwarf a second to realize he still had pants on. She released him and crawled away, obviously giving him room to finish undressing. He fumbled with his breeches, finally pulling them down and tossing them on the floor. The gasp she let out silenced the rest of the world. He looked at her, and she was staring directly at his manhood.

"I've never… by the creators!" She covered her mouth with her hands. Any other time he would have appreciated the boost to his ego, but this time he could see fear in her eyes. _It's huge! How is that going to…_

"Come here, Merrill. I promise I won't… Just come here." He pushed himself down off the headboard, lying on his side with his head on a pillow. She nodded and laid facing him. She still stared at his crotch, looking pale as a ghost. He placed a hand on her arm. "If you're not ready… I'm not going to"

She shook her head and gulped nervously. "No, no. I want to… I just… I didn't really expect… I don't think it will fit." He wanted to laugh, but he couldn't bring himself to hurt her feelings like that. Before he could say anything, she reached out and touched him. The air exited his body at her tiny palm touched the head. He fought with his arousal, trying to shrink himself down, even the tiniest bit. But she just kept touching him, discovering his anatomy. He closed his eyes, groaning as she found his balls. She must not have heard the sound, because she didn't pull away. He opened his eyes. She still had that ferocious look, but it was also full of wonder.

He reached out and pulled her lips to his, drawing her in for what was supposed to be a gentle kiss. But instead of reassuring her, she gripped his length and he found himself bucking against her hand and kissing her roughly. She pulled away from him, releasing his cock. "Was that good?"

"Maker, yes." He shook his head. "But this isn't about me. It's your first time." She nodded and kissed him lightly. Their lips and tongues danced, and he began to touch her again. He stroked her arms, her sides, her stomach, her breasts, back down to her thighs. He removed her panties quickly. He pushed at her hip, releasing her mouth and pressing her back to the bed. He positioned himself above her, his legs between hers, but not enough to touch. Her hand held his stubbled cheek as he bent forward to kiss her neck. She held him there, moving one hand to grip his shoulder. Her skin was so soft that he couldn't help but reach up and cup her breast again. She moaned, pushing her body against his, her moist folds just lightly touching his length. Her startled gasp caught his attention.

He moved his body down, replacing his hand with his lips as he kissed and sucked at her pink nipple. She wiggled and moaned again, tightening her grip. He reached down to touch her, releasing her breast. He could feel the heat against his stomach. One finger just brushed her sex. _Paragons of old! _She was drenched and her body shivered at his touch, her breath no longer in her. He didn't move, letting her intake air. His entire body was throbbing, but he bit his lip and restrained himself. His finger barely separated her folds. She moaned and tried to lift her hips. Her arousal was overtaking her, and she was nearly crying.

"I'm sorry." He slid his finger in and felt a thin wall. Biting his tongue, he pushed through it. She shuttered, uttering something unfamiliar in elven. He didn't move. Her body clamped down on him. She was incredibly tight. It took her a moment to get through the shock. He could tell she was ready when she began to push her hips against his broad hand.

"More." The word cut through his brain. He looked up at her. She was nearly breathless, but her eyes were a new shade of green. Much… darker. And she dug her nails into the back of his neck. "Please…"

He couldn't disappoint her now. He gently pulled his hand back before adding a second finger. She gasped again, and he was shocked when her body accommodated the new addition. She shivered, but pushed herself against his hand, somehow taking him to the knuckle. She moaned, her back arching up and pressing against him. He slid his fingers back, then pushed them in again. She was making a new sound… _purring? _Whatever it was, her body was vibrating. It was maddening. He pulled his hand away. She didn't seem to be happy about that, but he slid up her body a bit, his manhood at her entrance. "Are you ready?" His other hand stroked her cheek, and she nodded, biting her lip.

He used his moist hand to slowly guide himself inside her. She muffled a cry. He had barely made it to the tip. She was beginning to spread around him, giving him just enough room, but he waited. He didn't want to push too hard and hurt her. "More." He leaned in a little bit, giving her half. They took it step by step until she was able to take all of him. "Ma vhenan." She sighed against his forehead. His legs were trembling. It had been years since he had been with anyone. She ran a hand through his hair, then started gently moving her hips against his frame. "I like this." She continued her movements. He held his breath, letting her do as she pleased, deathly afraid of causing her discomfort. But she felt so good, so soft and hot. His hips jerked back a bit involuntarily, but he pushed back into her. She moaned and gripped his neck. He said something, he didn't know what, but he continued to slid in and out of her tight folds.

He was going very slow, but his resolve was starting to fade. "Elvarel!" She was digging her nails into his flesh and arching into him. He didn't know its exact translation, but he caught her meaning. He began to put more effort into his strokes, and she continued to tighten in response. They rocked against each other until she began to twitch and cry out. But he didn't stop. He could feel her orgasm around his hard cock, and he didn't stop until he came. He called out her name and collapsed onto her chest. They shook, breathless and unable to move. He finally began to shrink back.

He pulled himself back and laid next to her. She grumbled at first, not wanting to lose contact. He used his shirt to wipe himself clean, then offered it to her. She did the same, and he tossed it to the floor.

He suddenly noticed how cold it was without her touch, and he reached for a blanket. He covered them both. She rolled onto her side and he wrapped himself around her back. They suddenly felt unbelievably tired. She yawned and he kissed the back of her neck. Within a minute or so, he was drifting off to sleep, his beloved elf in his arms. "Ma'arlath, Merrill."

"Ma'arlath, Varric."

* * *

A slight rustling woke Varric from his slumber. Merrill had wrapped herself around his side, and was drooling on his shoulder. They were both still gloriously naked beneath the blanket. He looked out across the room, eyes still blurry from sleep.

"Well. That answers that question." He squinted. Sure enough, it was Hawke.

"Keep your voice down." He whispered. "She's sleeping." The little elf was breathily heavily.

"I was going to take Merrill to the market. You can imagine my surprise when I saw that she wasn't alone."

"Well, she's not. So go away." He lifted his other arm and shooed her.

"Alright, but my wife is going to hear about this, so be ready." She skipped out of the room and quietly shut the door. He groaned at the thought of Isabela grilling them both for details. It must have been a bit too audible, as his lover started to stir.

"V-Varric?" She blinked a few times and pawed at her cheek.

"Yes, Daisy, it's me." He stroked her hair and kissed her forehead.

"I wasn't dreaming?" She began to sit up, stretching her arms over her head.

"About us, no. After that, I'm not sure." He scratched at his chest and sat against the headboard. "How do you feel?"

She rubbed the sleep from her eyes and wiped off her drool. "A little sore, but happy. How about you?" She smiled at him. _She's glowing. _

"I'm just glad I could be of service." He chuckled, then began to slide to the edge of the bed.

"Where are you going?" She tilted her head to him and he stopped what he was doing.

"You said you were sore. I was going to draw a hot bath."

"I'd like that." He was about to stand. "But… would it be alright if… can we do that again?" He almost choked on air and sat back on the bed. When he turned his head she was sitting behind him with that wolf-and-halla look in her eye. He just blinked at her for a moment. She reached out and pinched his arm.

"Ow!" He rubbed his arm. "What was that for?"

"You're awake." She giggled at him.

"Maybe…" He made his way back to her. "But to prove it, you're going to have to do more than pinch me."


	7. Fruitcakes and Fetuses

Everyone had gathered at the tavern the day after the wedding. It was past midday by the time Varric and Merrill arrived, and they jumped quickly into the ongoing game of cards. "So… how was it?" Isabela asked casually, looking at Merrill over her cards.

"Isabela!" The dwarf hissed between his teeth. "You have no right-"

"It's alright ma durgen'len. It's not a secret." The elf glanced at him, put her cards down, and looked at the Pirate Queen. "If you must know, it was magical." She nodded her head in triumph and Varric hid his head behind his hand.

"Good girl!" The Rivaini reached across the table and ruffled her braids.

"I had no idea!" Aveline looked at the storyteller.

"I feel a little out of the loop. What are we talking about?" Bethany chimed in.

"The dwarf was just telling us about how he explored Kitten's Deep Roads."

Fenris spat his drink across the room. "THAT is what all that noise was about? I thought it was…" He looked at Zevran.

"Sadly, no, it was not you screaming all that elvish." The Antivan pointed out. "Though I will try harder next time, yes?"

"Oh, there's a story there." Hawke glanced between the two men.

"Ok, raise your hand if you haven't had sex in the last 24 hours!" Sebastian raised his hand and waited for anyone else, but no one joined him.

"Bethany!" Red glared at her sister. "Who did you…?" She looked over to Tallis. "Oh! Maker preserve us! A mage and a fruitcake!"

"It's not like that! Just… sometimes." The younger Hawke stammered.

"Oh, this is priceless!" Isabela cackled. "Did you submit to her Qun?" There were tears in her eyes. "I'm gonna die!" She gripped her ribs and laughed until she fell out of her seat. "All the Hawke's!" She banged her fist on the ground. "Skirtchasers!" She could barely breathe. Her wife couldn't help but burst into laughter too. Soon, the whole group joined in, even Tallis. Bethany did not seem amused.

"Shouldn't you be making fun of Merrill or Varric?" She stomped her foot.

"Oh, Maker no. This makes for a much juicier story!" The dwarf pulled out a quill and parchment. "And there they were, naked as the day they were born…"

"Oh! I almost forgot!" Merrill smacked herself on the forehead. She pulled something out of her pocket and handed it to Hawke, who sat recovering from laughter at her sister's expense. The larger woman nodded and hugged the Dalish elf.

"What's that?" The Pirate Queen asked, trying to pry open the Champion's hand.

"It's just a small wedding present. Nothing to concern yourself with." Red stuck it in her pocket. The swashbuckler had to fight to get herself off the floor and back into her seat.

"Were we supposed to give presents?" Fenris asked, raising an eyebrow.

"No, no. This was a favor of sorts. Let's just get back to poking fun at my sibling, shall we?"

"You're cruel, Red." Her sister glared at her.

"Oh, please. I'm only messing with you. Maker knows if I were single- OW!" Isabela pinched her wife on the ass. "I was just- STOP THAT!" She rubbed the sore spot. "Well I think it's amusing since Tallis, Isabela, and I have all slept with Leliana, and now you've slept with Tallis…." The look on the mage's face was beyond words.

"I need a drink." She walked over to the bar.

"And here I thought the sixth toe would freak you out…" Tallis mumbled to herself.

"I'll be at the chantry, if anyone needs me." Sebastian quickly took off.

"Well, as long as you didn't literally submit to the Qun, all is forgiven. I'd hate to see you all sown up and shackled." Her wife cackled again. "Oh, enough out of you! That's just… stop putting pictures in my head! She's my sister!" She elbowed her lover.

"If it makes you feel any better, I was very persuasive." Tallis pointed out to the big sister.

"Did you claim to have her nose?" Isabela continued to jest.

"But that's my only good joke!" The red-haired elf complained.

"Joke, si. Good, no." Zevran shook his head.

"This is all extremely interesting, but if you don't mind, I'm going to go vomit." Aveline gave Bethany a dirty look and left.

"Don't worry, Bethany. Everyone picks on you because they like you. We never made fun of Anders. At least, not in front of him." Merrill smiled, patting the other mage on the shoulder. She turned around from the bar.

"If you want to hear some funny stories, I've got loads of dirt on Red." She glared at her sister. "You talk in your sleep… Sometimes you gave names… and locations…"

"You wouldn't!" She glared back.

"Don't reap what you're afraid to sew, Champion!" Varric readied his quill for a mischievous tale. "Please, do tell!"

* * *

"You never told me about that incident in the Chantry garden!" Isabela joked as she began to undress. _Damn Bethany for giving away all my secrets. _

"I didn't know where I was at the time. I had an entire bottle of wine to myself earlier in the evening. Maker, the woman would not shut up! It was all 'dress this' and 'gown that'. I didn't realize being a seamstress was her life's calling! And next thing I know, the woman throws herself at me, and I land ass-first in the Revered Mother's rosebushes!" Hawke removed her boots and sat on the bed.

"I'll bet that slowed her down!" She was stark naked and looking in the mirror.

"Oh, I wish! Her tongue was like a piece of dead meat! If Bethany overheard that from my sleep, it must have been a nightmare!" She took the tie from her hair and ran her hand through it.

"Any other delectable tales you wish to tell?" The pirate sauntered over to her lover, tucking stray hairs behind her ears.

"I've got a really juicy one about a Rivaini pirate." She wrapped her arm around her wife's waist and pulled her close, kissing the lower part of her cleavage.

"Ooo, I think I've heard that one. Did it invoke your legs shivering and your toes curling?" She chuckled, stroking her crimson hair.

"I dare say you took the words right out of my mouth. But you forgot a very important detail."

"Oh? Was it the role-play? Or the bondage? The screaming, perhaps?" Red leaned back, and reached into her pocket, bringing out the talisman Merrill had enhanced for her.

"You forgot the happily ever after." She stood and put the necklace on her Pirate Queen.

"A Rivaini fertility talisman? Do I look like I am in need of fruitful loins?" She looked at her tattooed hero, wondering where in the world she found such a distasteful piece of jewelry.

"You took care of the wedding, so I made arrangements for future children." She touched the talisman, then sat back down on the bed.

"So Merrill toyed with this thing, and it will somehow get me pregnant? I'm nothing if not skeptical. How is it even supposed to work?" She looked down at her wife.

"To be honest, I don't have the slightest idea. It might not even work." She rubbed her forehead. "But it's worth a shot."

"Why now?" The swashbuckler sat next to her spouse. "We've been happy. We just got married yesterday. Why the sudden rush for motherhood?" Her thumb traced the tattoo on Red's cheek.

"You left for six months. I was so… alone. It was just like the time you left after the Qun'ari incident. I knew you didn't leave me here on purpose, but you said it yourself, you nearly died a dozen times. And… I didn't even have anything of ours… anything to remember you by…"

"Oh, Hawke. You humble me with your kindness. I really hadn't thought of it that way." She rubbed her upper back and kissed her temple. "If you want a baby, I'll do my best to give you one."

"I…" The Champion faced her ship's captain. "Only if that's what you want. You're going to be the one carrying it for nine months, after all."

"Why does it have to be me, again?" She smirked, pressing her lips to her pale forehead, and then laying back on the mattress.

"Put simply, you have wider hips." Her lover leaned over and poked her hip bone.

"Yes, but my breasts are bound to get larger." She grabbed her own chest.

"The more, the merrier, I always say." Red stood and finished getting undressed.

"If you suffocate, don't blame me." The Rivaini worked her way up to the pillows on the bed, and she threw one at the now naked Hawke. The larger woman picked it up and threw it back, then crawled on the bed.

"There are worse ways to die." The Champion hovered over her wife and kissed her neck.

"Are you sure you want me to be even more hormonal?" The pirate pulled a burgundy sheet up to cover them both.

"You'll slap me, then kiss me, then cry like a little girl before stuffing your face with cookies. You're the same way when you're drunk, honestly." A light slap to her tattooed cheek proved her point.

"Oh damn it all! I won't be able to drink either!" The swashbuckler ran her hand through her hair.

"No drinking, smoking, or dueling, I'm afraid. I'd hate to damage our little one." A pale hand stroked her lover's flat stomach.

"You sure do ask a lot of me, Hawke!" She rubbed her forehead.

"Yes, I know. But, as the other half of our future rogue, I am also obligated to keep you… pleasantly entertained throughout the pregnancy." She pressed her lips to the Rivaini's. "It's going to be hard work keeping up with you, but someone is going to have to do it." A wicked grin pulled at her mouth before she leaned in to kiss her wife.

"Ooo, there's a thought. Maybe this whole baby thing isn't such a bad idea, after all." Red looked down in confusion as the talisman began to glow. Her partner also glared at the jewelry. It opened up like the petals of a flower. Their jaws dropped as they looked at each other. Strange clouds came out of their mouths, and it looked like colored smoke. Hawke's was red and Isabela's was blue. The small gas balls met and swirled in the air above the necklace, turning a deep purple, before floating down into the talisman. In a moment, it closed back up again, and the spouses just looked at each other.

"So… I'm pregnant?" The Rivaini pawed at her stomach, not feeling anything.

"Do you… feel any different?" Her lover moved her head around, looking for anything odd in her eyes.

"I'm… a little tingly…" She was starting to get goosebumps.

"Where? Nice tingly, or loss-of-blood tingly?" Red laid next to her lover, trying to look her over and look for injuries.

"Weird… but good tingly. In a… familiar place." She pointed down towards her thighs.

"Oh… OH! I… it must have worked! But how?" She placed her head on her lover's stomach, though she knew full well she wouldn't hear or feel anything for quite some time.

"We were just talking about pregnancy, and I was thinking about how beautiful our baby would be…" The pirate was shrugging and mumbling.

"And so was I!" Hawke smacked herself on the forehead. "If that was all we needed to do, I would have gave Merrill that stupid necklace ages ago!"

"So, we don't need to have sex?" Isabela groaned, disappointed.

"No, I guess we don't… But we're already naked." Red sat up and kissed her neck.

"Yes, and I think we should kick off this nine months of rutting immediately!"

"I'd expect nothing less from the mother of my children."

* * *

"Has everyone double-checked their bags? If you leave anything behind, I dare say you'll never see it again." The Champion looked out upon her guests as they began loading their luggage onto the outgoing ship.

"Quacking orders already? You're mothering is kicking in early!" Bethany poked fun at her sister.

"Someone's got to carry on the family name, my dear mage." She raised an eyebrow.

"Well, I think I'll be going, Hawke. It was great to see you and your… wife." Aveline hugged the hero and nodded to Isabela. Donnic and Isaac gave quick waves before boarding.

"I'm going to miss you too, Man Hands." The Rivaini blew her a kiss, causing the ginger to make a fake sickly face. She quickly joined her little family on the ship.

"If you are ever in need of my services, please, do not hesitate to write." Zevran held Fenris' hand to his lips, kissing his knuckle.

"I'm just going to go back to Starkhaven. Too much sin around here." Sebastian nodded to Hawke. The Antivan and the prince also retreated to the ship.

"We prefer it that way!" Varric pointed a finger to the other archer.

"It was lovely to see you all again. I'm glad it was under better circumstances this time around." Tallis bowed to Red.

"Oh, Bethany, Tallis! Do have a good ride! And a safe voyage too!" Isabela winked at the two women, who blushed and boarded separately.

"Bye, everyone! Please come again soon!" Merrill waved as the ship loaded its last cargo and began to set sail.

"You know, we do have a ship. If we wanted to go visit them when the baby came…" The Champion pointed to the large vessel at the end of the docks.

"Could we?" Merrill gleamed up at the tattooed hero and her eyes got all big and watery.

"Yes, Hawke, could we?" Varric playfully copied his girlfriend's gesture.

"We haven't even picked out a name and you want to start planning adventures!" Isabela looked down at her still flat stomach. "You're in for a wild ride, my dear."

"Ooo, how about Aurora, or Elizabeth, or Cassandra?" Red wrapped her arm around her wife as they began walking back to the estate.

"What about Serenity?" Merrill suggested as they skipped along.

"Heavens, no! Never name a girl anything like Serenity or Chastity, or Charity! They're always bound to disappoint and end up working a corner!" Isabela rubbed her belly.

"What about boy's names? Aren't you assuming a lot by only listing one gender?" Fenris pursed his lips as he walked alone alongside them.

"Shit. I hadn't thought of that… Any way to make sure it's a girl?" Hawke looked to her young elf mage. She thought for a moment before shaking her head.

"Oh, I'm afraid it's in the Maker's hands now." _Damnit, Varric. I hate when you're right. _


End file.
